My 29th birthday at The Roost was awesome.
At one point I looked around and told somebody, “I’m one cocktail away from having a very serious moment and crying of overwhelming happiness.”
The bar was filled with so many people I love. I felt so lucky to realize that these were all my friends.
I wish I took a portrait of every single person who showed up.
(I was born at 4:24PM, for most of my life my mother told me I was born at 4:20, imagine my disappointment when I finally checked my birth certificate.)
A few weeks ago, in the middle of a conversation, I casually said to a friend, “28 was the best year of my life.” He stopped and looked at me and said, “That’s kind of a big deal.”
28 was the best year of my life because I had friends. A lot of friends. I have never had so many cool people in my life, ever. I wouldn’t have met any of these people if it weren’t for improv and comedy.
I feel incredibly lucky to get to surround myself with funny people every day. Funny, beautiful people who I can never be too weird around. Who I can be myself around. Who I support, who support me, who inspire me, who motivate me.
28 was the best year of my life because of comedy. It took me 28 years to find it and fall in love with it, but it was so ridiculously worth the wait. I will be here until I die.
I know I talk about it all the time, but improv changed my life. A big thing you learn when you start learning improv is commitment. When you watch someone commit to a scene, an emotion, a character, it’s just so fucking funny. You will believe anything when someone commits. I now use this mentality in my life with EVERYTHING, and my life has been more fulfilling. I can finally walk into a room full of people and fight my anxiety. I can write whatever I want and make videos and take classes and do shows and have fun in auditions. I can tell a boy I like exactly how I feel. I can make eye contact with strangers. I can dance alone at a party. I can be alone. I can try something new. I can defend myself and stand up for what I believe in. I can do whatever the fuck I want!
I could never do any of these things before I was 28. None of them.
I’ve been thinking a lot about free will. I’m so grateful! Aren’t we lucky? WE CAN DO WHATEVER THE FUCK WE WANT!
I spent my first birthday in Los Angeles four years ago with a boyfriend, and two friends. I could barely get myself to go out that night, I felt so sad, and lonely, and hopeless.
I will spend tomorrow night with over 100 of the coolest fucking people in Los Angeles. I’m single. I can’t wait to see everybody. I am full of love, and I’m insanely grateful.
Happy fucking Birthday.